Monday, November 10, 2003
It's been a banner movie week for me. Last Wednesday, I caught the new Matrix (see last post), tonight I'm seeing Elf and Sunday, I caught the mother of all fall blockbusters - the new IMAX movie, Bugs (Caution - spoilers ahead).
I've got to hand it to the San Diego IMAX theater... they run quite an operation. The line was a little long, but we successfully snapped up tickets before they sold out. Plus, thanks to the quick thinking of a Science Center ticket taker, we managed to beat about 30 Catholic school kids by cutting through the gift shop. Nice work, Tim!
To get us ready for the wonders that awaited us, a docent took the mike and warmed us up with a quick intro and warning: "For those of you who have cell phones, pagers or small children, please turn them off." I was actually fine with parents placing their children on vibrate, but they opted to go the extra mile.
We started off with a preview of the next IMAX film - Australia. Continent of mysterious creatures and beautiful landscapes. Whatever. There are more things that can kill you on Australian beaches than in downtown Baltimore. Maybe that's why all of today's best talent is coming from there. It's like the hot, grotty version of Russia.
Then the movie started. Presented by Terminix. Yep, more big business interfering with the creative minds of Hollywood. And there goes the sweet Bug's Life finish. No cute soundtrack, either, by the way. On the plus side, it did feature an excellent narration by Judi Dench. That woman could make Akiva Goldsman's dialogue sound good.
Our movie begins in an abandoned shack in the middle of the rainforest. Our main characters: Papilio, the caterpillar (surprisingly a female, despite the masculine 'o' ending), and Hierodula, the preying mantis (again, sounds like an angry chick from a Greek tragedy, but it's a guy).
And this is when my five years in film development really hurts me. Cuz I know what's coming. A preying mantis and a caterpillar. The jungle isn't big enough for these two... one will have to go. And the odds aren't good for poor Papilio.
Sure enough, we watch the two as they go through their life cycles. Papilio, after chewing through his egg sack (filled with protein... GAK), gets just grossly fat and spends his days waddling around citrus leaves until he forms a cool-looking leaf-like cocoon. He does encounter Hierodula once during his fat caterpillar life, but fortunately Hierodula's already torn the head off some fly and doesn't notice Papilio through his slurping.
So, while Papilio is busy melting away the pounds, Hierodula breaks away from his 200 brothers and sisters and starts using his razor-sharp spear legs to kill unsuspecting bug meals. He mates at one point, and even successfully manages to keep his head (according to Dench, it's all about foreplay and a gentle touch... I was hoping that the little Catholic school boys in the audience were listening, but I think they were kind of grossed out at that point).
Finally, Papilio emerges from her cocoon and *gasp* she's a beautiful butterfly. Of course, they don't show you a lot of close ups of the wings. I figure there must've been like 12 different actors playing Papilio in the film, but they hide that well.
Anyway, Papilio finds a guy (not hard... she's hot), mates and lays her eggs. Then, while innocently pollinating a group of pink, puffy flowers, we notice a familiar character in the fringes. It's Hierodula. The jig is up... Papilio's time has come.
And come it does. In one, quick jab, Hierodula spears sweet, little Papilio and bites her head off. The next thing you see is a pair of lovely butterfly wings floating gently down a nearby river.
Dench says something about completing the life cycle, but whatever. This is a movie - I want a happy ending! The filmmakers try to make it all okay by showing Papilio's little kid emerging from her egg sack (a new generation), but it can't erase the terrifying image of those body-less wings. "Where's my mommy?" the little, fuzzy caterpillar baby seems to ask. She's dead, kid. Just another faceless victim of the jungle. Get used to it.
I don't know about the Catholic school kids, but I was disappointed. Don't get me wrong... the acting and special effects were great (especially this one Matrix-like shot of the preying mantis stalking a fly). I just need a good, happy ending for once. Thank god I'm seeing Elf tonight. Bring on the funny, Hollywood!
I've got to hand it to the San Diego IMAX theater... they run quite an operation. The line was a little long, but we successfully snapped up tickets before they sold out. Plus, thanks to the quick thinking of a Science Center ticket taker, we managed to beat about 30 Catholic school kids by cutting through the gift shop. Nice work, Tim!
To get us ready for the wonders that awaited us, a docent took the mike and warmed us up with a quick intro and warning: "For those of you who have cell phones, pagers or small children, please turn them off." I was actually fine with parents placing their children on vibrate, but they opted to go the extra mile.
We started off with a preview of the next IMAX film - Australia. Continent of mysterious creatures and beautiful landscapes. Whatever. There are more things that can kill you on Australian beaches than in downtown Baltimore. Maybe that's why all of today's best talent is coming from there. It's like the hot, grotty version of Russia.
Then the movie started. Presented by Terminix. Yep, more big business interfering with the creative minds of Hollywood. And there goes the sweet Bug's Life finish. No cute soundtrack, either, by the way. On the plus side, it did feature an excellent narration by Judi Dench. That woman could make Akiva Goldsman's dialogue sound good.
Our movie begins in an abandoned shack in the middle of the rainforest. Our main characters: Papilio, the caterpillar (surprisingly a female, despite the masculine 'o' ending), and Hierodula, the preying mantis (again, sounds like an angry chick from a Greek tragedy, but it's a guy).
And this is when my five years in film development really hurts me. Cuz I know what's coming. A preying mantis and a caterpillar. The jungle isn't big enough for these two... one will have to go. And the odds aren't good for poor Papilio.
Sure enough, we watch the two as they go through their life cycles. Papilio, after chewing through his egg sack (filled with protein... GAK), gets just grossly fat and spends his days waddling around citrus leaves until he forms a cool-looking leaf-like cocoon. He does encounter Hierodula once during his fat caterpillar life, but fortunately Hierodula's already torn the head off some fly and doesn't notice Papilio through his slurping.
So, while Papilio is busy melting away the pounds, Hierodula breaks away from his 200 brothers and sisters and starts using his razor-sharp spear legs to kill unsuspecting bug meals. He mates at one point, and even successfully manages to keep his head (according to Dench, it's all about foreplay and a gentle touch... I was hoping that the little Catholic school boys in the audience were listening, but I think they were kind of grossed out at that point).
Finally, Papilio emerges from her cocoon and *gasp* she's a beautiful butterfly. Of course, they don't show you a lot of close ups of the wings. I figure there must've been like 12 different actors playing Papilio in the film, but they hide that well.
Anyway, Papilio finds a guy (not hard... she's hot), mates and lays her eggs. Then, while innocently pollinating a group of pink, puffy flowers, we notice a familiar character in the fringes. It's Hierodula. The jig is up... Papilio's time has come.
And come it does. In one, quick jab, Hierodula spears sweet, little Papilio and bites her head off. The next thing you see is a pair of lovely butterfly wings floating gently down a nearby river.
Dench says something about completing the life cycle, but whatever. This is a movie - I want a happy ending! The filmmakers try to make it all okay by showing Papilio's little kid emerging from her egg sack (a new generation), but it can't erase the terrifying image of those body-less wings. "Where's my mommy?" the little, fuzzy caterpillar baby seems to ask. She's dead, kid. Just another faceless victim of the jungle. Get used to it.
I don't know about the Catholic school kids, but I was disappointed. Don't get me wrong... the acting and special effects were great (especially this one Matrix-like shot of the preying mantis stalking a fly). I just need a good, happy ending for once. Thank god I'm seeing Elf tonight. Bring on the funny, Hollywood!
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